Labor & Delivery
I birthed a baby!
One of the biggest purposes of prenatal and childbirth classes is being educated on labor and delivery so that you can make informed decisions at that moment. When shit hits the fan sometimes you just forget what you know. I did!
HAVE A BIRTH PLAN
I made a birth plan, a super simple one, cause my husband and I just didn't have strong feelings about how things should go. We were both okay with going with the flow of things. We had a few things in mind and my provider was on board with those things. I wanted a vaginal birth and to try laboring unmedicated as long as possible.
Well, none of that happened! I labored a good 10 hours unmedicated and most of that at home. I opted for the epidural, but we ended up regretting that decision. There is a possibility that it hindered my progress. Then I ended up having a cesarian because baby was coming out but I was not progressing even with medicine to help (Pitocin).
MY BIRTH MY WAY
Nothing happened the way that we thought it would. I'm sure that the pandemic had a hand in how things went while at the hospital, but even with a solid birth plan for anyone, is anyone actually prepared for their labor and delivery? We were not!
Early labor was better than I expected - I managed to work a 10-hour shift at the busiest office in my county at the DMV (my drive home was a little difficult!). The next day was active labor and actually really managed quite well in the beginning. Towards the middle of the day contractions got more intense and close enough to head to the hospital.
Comedic relief - but a true nightmare for me - my doctor never transferred their phones for the day to the answering service!!! I could not locate the number until we got to the hospital (hey! it was not my first thought to check the website after calling 100 times and being unsuccessful). But we got there and I was brought right in and evaluated - and asked for the epidural. My poor husband, because of current regulations, had to wait over an hour to join me.
I got to 4cm dilated at home. Then I stopped. What I didn't know is that around that time, some women plateau and can progress with time. The OB on call tried to help me along with medicine and different positions to encourage progress and after 5 more hours, we decided on a cescarian. This was the worst experience in my entire life.
"Women can fight guys all they want on 'Oh you haven't been there'. That's fine, I don't care about that, but if you see a woman in pain, like I saw you in pain, it kind of opens your eyes a little bit more, because that was pain"
- Bobby (husband)
For my husband to see pain in my eyes and across my face, was traumatic for both of us. We agreed that we wouldn't do this again - at first, we said it about children. Now, we are considering it and know that we would make a birth and postpartum plan, have a doula, opt for no meds, and potentially have a home birth. While we had this experience, not all new parents will! I have so many friends who had beautiful births and some who had worse experiences. While I cannot change anything for myself or for you, I have needed to talk about this to process my trauma, and have it on my heart to hear your experience if it will help you. Let's chat about it one day!
Would it help you to share your story? Let's chat about it one day!